


No Shit Sherlock

by Im_not_a_crack_pot



Category: Batman - All Media Types, DCU
Genre: Bruce Wayne is a Good Parent, Implied/Referenced Underage Drinking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-19
Updated: 2019-02-19
Packaged: 2019-10-31 20:28:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 347
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17856449
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Im_not_a_crack_pot/pseuds/Im_not_a_crack_pot
Summary: Damian has canonically said shit in front of Bruce so I wanted to write that scenario...then it got out of hand.





	No Shit Sherlock

**Author's Note:**

> Ok so Damian is a little older here like...15 or so, also Colin is alive cause I love him. 
> 
> And Bruce it's a good but strict parent.

Damian was drunk.

 

He swears on his family lives that this is the last time he'll let Colin talk him into one of his “grown man adventures”.

 

He had somehow made it into his room without dying, putting on his costume was hell though. His stomach was revolted and his throat was sore. Luckily  the domino mask helped hide his “ corpse just pulled out of the river” face.

 

“You're awfully quiet”

 

He blinked in surprise as he realized he was in fact, in the batmobile with his father in full costume next to him. The revelation of being into a moving vehicle made his stomach twist.

 

“I'm fine” he cleared his throat. Everything hurt, he almost wished he was in hell again.

 

The voices of the police officers started to come from the radio, Robin had to restrain himself from covering his ears in pain.

 

“The lock has been broken, we suspect breaking and entering” 

 

“Yeah no shit Sherlock” Damian said as he covered his face.

 

Bruce took this as a sign to return. He was actually curious to see how long his thought he could pull it off but he wasn't fooling anyone, especially with the obvious smell of beer coming from him.

 

“If your throw up in the batmobile you'll clean it up in the morning” he warned him as he turned back 6to the manor “Also you're grounded for three weeks as of now”

 

“But whyy” Robin whined looking at the ceiling “Damian made me do it”

 

“You should know better than ceasing to peer pressure” Batman said.

 

Damian laid his head against and stared out the window for a minute.

 

“Dad”

 

“Yes?” 

 

“Why does your costume have ears? What do they do?”

 

Bruce gave Damian a batarang which he found so interesting that he focused on it until he fall asleep and had to be put on his bed.

 

He woke up with a killer headache, he turned to the side of bed and puked, luckily Bruce had put a bucket there the night before, along with water and a jar of pills.


End file.
